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The Ache for Approval and learning to Trust Yourself

 


We, as humans, are often driven by a deep, almost insatiable need to seek validation from others. It’s a longing that’s embedded in us, like an itch we can never quite scratch. But when it comes to living—truly living, the kind that grounds you—it’s not about the approval of others. It’s about taking ownership, about accountability. The truth is, I think we crave external validation because, somewhere deep inside, we’re scared to make decisions on our own. There’s something intimidating about the idea of free will is the weight of knowing that every choice, every mistake, is yours to bear. The fear of being responsible for your own failures in the eyes of the world can be overwhelming.

But here’s the thing...what if the key to living a fulfilling life is learning to trust your own decisions? What if it’s not about having the approval of everyone around you, but about recognizing the things that truly make you happy, the things that fill you up and make you feel whole? We’re always searching for something more, something to fill that space inside us, and often we turn outward to find it. But maybe, just maybe, that “more” is actually an understanding of ourselves—the quiet moments when you realize what really lights you up. What brings you joy without needing anyone else’s permission to feel it?

Because, let’s face it, as humans, we are inherently insatiable. We’re always chasing something. But maybe the chase isn’t about finding approval or meeting the expectations of others. Maybe it’s about embracing the journey, accepting the uncertainty, and trusting that what makes us feel complete is already inside us. We just need to let go of the fear of being wrong, of failing, and trust in our own power to choose. After all, life is too short to wait for someone else to tell us what’s worth loving.

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